My cat doesn't like me - Causes and what to do

Author: Laura McKinney
Date Of Creation: 9 August 2021
Update Date: 15 December 2024
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If you've recently adopted a cat and noticed that it rejects you, or if, on the contrary, you have been living harmoniously with your furry cat for a long time, but it has distanced itself from you and no longer loves you as before, you may feel confused and without much waiting that your cat might like you.Not surprisingly, when we welcome a new member into our family, we want to be able to express our affection through hugs and play, and it can be counterproductive for our cat to distance ourselves from us.

So if you think the your cat doesn't like you and you want to know why and how to solve this, you are in the right place. In this article by PeritoAnimal, we can help you to resolve this situation: My cat doesn't like me - causes and what to do.


my cat doesn't want to sleep with me anymore

Cats are one of the most social and affectionate animals, contrary to what many people may believe. However, they don'tthey are always very receptive to our pampering and affectionate words. We each have quirks and needs, but we all need our space from time to time, and cats are no different. For this reason, if your cat sometimes rejects you, pulling away from you when you sit next to him, jumping out of your arms when you catch him and even scratching or biting you when you pet him, don't take it personally . Certainly, your cat has already asked you through body language to leave him alone, since at that moment he wants to be alone, and later he will be the one to ask for affection or ask to play.

However, the situation is usually slightly different if you noticed that your cat doesn't like you like before and you stopped sleeping together. If you had a good relationship with your feline and he suddenly started ignoring you and even rejecting you, you need to try to figure out what happened to justify this abrupt change.


why my cat doesn't like me

If you think your cat doesn't really love you, or has stopped loving you like before, it could be for one of the following reasons. Below, we explain how to know if your cat does not love you by finding the cause that may be causing this rejection:

you are too affectionate

Sometimes cats tend to withdraw from us because our displays of affection are excessive. This is normal, as it can be difficult to avoid the urge to pet our kitten! Even so, you should always respect the limits that your cat imposes to not overload you, otherwise, he may start to distrust you, get angry and even hurt you.

Also, you need to understand that there are contexts in which it cannot disturb you. For example, would you like someone to wake you up unannounced while you sleep peacefully? You probably wouldn't like it, and neither would your cat.


He had a negative experience

Sometimes your feline may reject you because associated a negative experience with you. If you've punished your cat, something you should never do, because he doesn't understand it and only serves to intimidate you for no reason, and after that you've noticed a change in his character, it's possible that this is the reason for your rejection. Or, for example, if you accidentally hurt him while holding or cuddling him, he may also have associated this very negative fact with your presence. So the cat associated the pain he felt with you.

you still need to meet him

If you've recently welcomed your cat into your family, it's only natural that he still doesn't fully trust you. many cats need time to adjust to their new home and its members, and for that reason, until they know that they are not in a hostile place, they will be insecure with their environment and contact with others. Every individual is unique and therefore there are some cats more shy than others.

In addition, we often do not fully know the background of the pet we adopt, so you may not know that it has suffered negative experiences such as abuse and that it may, as a result, have developed a more suspicious personality.

He is not getting the necessary care

It is possible that your cat is skittish because its welfare is not completely covered. As guardians, we must guarantee our pet its food, safety and fun (social and environmental), so that he is always comfortable. If, on the other hand, our pet doesn't get enough exercise because it's an apartment cat, or we never play with it, it can get stressed and behave in a hostile way, for example.

Has any significant change occurred in your environment.

Cats need to keep their environment under control to feel protected, and that's why they are very sensitive animals to change. In this way, if there has been a recent significant change in the house and the cat has not had enough time to adapt, or if it has not done so correctly, it may have a more temperamental or skittish personality, since feel insecure.

It's not strange to hear people say "I'm pregnant and my cat doesn't like me" or "my cat has been hiding since we got another one at home", for example. This happens, as we said, because the animal is stressed with this change in its routine and needs to adapt to the new situation. Another situation in which it is quite common to feel that the cat has stopped loving us is after a vacation. “I went on vacation and my cat doesn't love me anymore” is a totally normal situation, and the reason is the same. The animal went through a very big change, due to the absence of its guide, it may have felt alone and even abandoned.

the cat is not well

In situations where you observe a sudden change in your pet's behavior, you should suspect that it may be due to the fact that he is suffering from some pain or clinical pathology. In such cases, you should always take him to the vet.

What to do if my cat doesn't like me?

If your cat avoids being with you or literally rejects you, it's important to try to understand why. As discussed earlier, there are several reasons for this to happen. So, below, we'll show you what to do in each situation if your cat doesn't love you:

give him time

If your cat has recently arrived at the house, give him time to familiarize himself with the environment. and with other family members. It is necessary that you do not force him to live situations that can be threatening, as he still does not trust you and this can become a negative experience, something counterproductive in your relationship. We also recommend using a pheromone diffuser during this time, as this will help your cat feel more comfortable, facilitating the adjustment process. For more information on the process of adapting a cat to the house, we recommend reading the article: Advice for a cat's first days at home.

Relate with him in a positive way.

Now, if you and your cat have been around for a long time, but he has never shown a special interest in bonding with you or has lost confidence in you due to a bad experience, you should learn to bond with him in a pleasant and avoiding way. excesses, like petting him when he doesn't want to or wanting to play with him all the time.

so you must pay attention to how your cat feels before interacting with him, you should try to understand him and, in addition, avoid that every time it is just you who initiates the interaction. That is, pay attention to the moments when your cat approaches you (for example, if he lies down beside you) and try to pet him at those moments, if he is receptive, or give him some pleasure, so that he know that you are someone interesting. Gradually, you will see how he will feel more comfortable with you and will accept you better. If you want to learn more about how to improve your relationship with your furry friend, we invite you to read 5 tips for gaining a cat's trust.

respect his personality

A very common mistake is to believe that the cat doesn't love its guardians just because it isn't as affectionate as other cats are to their humans. So you need to understand that, just like us, each cat has its characteristics and your personality. So your cat doesn't need to be as affectionate or playful as others, and just because he's not affectionate to you doesn't mean he doesn't love you, because he probably adores you in his own way.

Discover the 5 personalities of cats according to Lauren Finka.

Enrich your environment and ensure your well-being

If you think your pet's behavior is because its well-being is not being covered, you will need to find the focus and address it. He may be feeling frustrated by the lack of entertainment in your daily life and therefore you will have to guarantee him an environmental enrichment and spend more time playing with him. Or it may be that he feels insecure due to a significant change in his routine or at home, in which case it will be necessary to respect the animal's adaptation time, without ever forcing him. You can also try to help him out by using a pheromone diffuser.

In either case, you may notice other symptoms of stress in your cat that may contribute to a decrease in her well-being. Now, if you don't notice improvement or if you notice other serious symptoms, such as the cat stopping eating, take it to the vet to rule out any clinical pathology that may have altered its behavior.